Reflections

Today is very strange. I wasn't sure how I was going to feel. I was definitely getting frustrated with all the media coverage leading up to today. I know why it existed, but there was so much.

I subbed for a member of the adult bell choir at my church this morning, so was up way earlier than I normally am, and collapsed in front of the TV when I got home for awhile, watching the towers fall again, and the ceremonies at the Ground Zero memorial, and the towers fall again. I remember watching a fair amount of TV in 2001, as an 8th-grader, but I don't remember watching again on subsequent anniversaries or taking tons and tons of time - a whole day, really - to remember and reflect until today.

Just the other week, I visited the National Museum of American History with two friends. In the exhibition called "Science in American Life" (or something like that), there is a section about the creation of the atomic bomb and the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. I re-read the number I had read at some point in history class a while ago hit me the hardest its hit me thus far in my young adulthood.

The United States was responsible for the deaths of more than 200,000 people in those two bombings in 1945.

Yes, the military personnel who were responsible for the deaths and destruction of the bomb did not kill themselves in its detonation with the belief that they would get into heaven. And yes, when the atomic bomb was dropped, my country was explicitly involved in an awful war that had already claimed the lives of many. In the case of 9/11, we know what the motives of the hijackers were, and we were not at war.

But I think that number hit me so hard because from my life experience and classes of the last few years, I have realized that I really want my country to remember all of its history, with a critical (which doesn't always mean negative) collective memory instead of a selective one. As those who have dealt with mental illness and/or addictions know, recognizing and acknowledging a problem is one of the first steps on the road to recovery. I think the same is true for the conscious of our nation. As we remember and recognize our whole history, we take more steps on the road to a healthier country, ie., interfaith work such as the DC Unity Walk and educational events, particularly about Islam, that I participated in or heard about in Omaha.

There are lots and lots of good stories today about the good that people have done in the past 10 years. (Just read some in the Parade section that we get with the Washington Post.) That's an example of taking something awful (the death of a loved one), reflecting on it, and instead of spending hours focusing energy on thoughts of revenge, using that energy to create positive opportunities for others.

The national news in the last six months has been pretty damn infuriating, and there's a lot of issues to deal with. Today was sort of a reminder to me that I can take my energy of frustration with government and just sort of sit around and wring my hands...or I can use that energy to figure out something to do about it, whether it's getting in touch with the editor of my local paper or my representatives in government, or talking to people about it, or journaling or writing in this blog, or whatever. Something that transforms conflict can always be done.  This applies to other aspects of life as well. I just wish for the future that it won't take another violent and evil tragedy to remind me or my fellow citizens that.

I'm not sure I'm wild about every single sentence in this article, but I would still recommend checking out E.J. Dionne's column, "It's time for the nation to let go of 9/11".

Don't forget to tell your loved ones how you feel about them. And sleep well, remembering that bad things have happened, but there is ALWAYS something you can do about them.

Love,
Anna